VOLuntarilyConservative

I understand that most Americans probably didn't watch much of the first day of the Democratic National Convention last night. I heard many adults didn't want to see so many people on illegal drugs, overt sexual displays, and poorly read scripts and instead tuned into WWE Raw on the SciFi Network for more wholesome entertainment.

If you didn't watch the Convention coverage last night, here is what you missed:

• Nancy Pelosi showed her commitment to discouraging domestic drilling by riding a caribou into the Pepsi Center. She was dismayed later on when the caribou later trampled North Carolina Congressman and noted Pelosi supporter Heath Shuler when the caribou blitzed the former Washington Redskin quarterback from his blindside.
• Rep. Jessie Jackson, Jr. tried to match his father's record for most consecutive rhymes in a speech but failed miserably. He later pledged not to try to outdo his father on any of his other records, including most illegitimate children by an ordained pastor.
• A video montage outlined the Kennedy contributions over the years to increasing the number of missing and raped women in America.
• In an embarrassing moment, Joe Biden was caught by a FoxNews camera hocking old speeches to convention speakers who were dissatisfied with their own written monologues.
• Michelle Obama, wearing traditional Muslim dress, capped the night off with a stirring prayer to Allah, followed by a ceremonial burning of an American flag her husband had stolen from a battalion serving in Afghanistan.

Like I said, if you didn't watch last night, that's what you should think happened last night...

Labels: 2008 Democratic National Convention